Faculty speaks on depression
Lovejoy said that her depression began in high school, but at the time she did not recognize it as a serious issue. Not until much later, did Lovejoy realize how truly severe her condition was. Episodes of depression continued through her adult life, and by 1997, several stressful life experiences coupled with other medical conditions finally began to send her over the edge.
Lovejoy described her episodes of depression.
“I had signs of depression as early as high school,” said Lovejoy. “But it was not ’til much later, around 1997, that the real problems began.”
By this time, a series of stressful events and a biological predisposition had taken their toll. Lovejoy begain to expeience episodes of depression, which she described as, “a period of darkness – like I was in a deep pit, and unable to get out.”
She explained that she experienced phases of mania (an effect of the bipolar disorder). During these phases, her mind raced to the point that she could not sleep.
Finally, Lovejoy explained a third state that was perhaps more terrible than either depression or mania. She described what she called a, “Gray state,” where she felt unemotional and almost inhuman.
Lovejoy realized that she needed serious help. After a series of mostly unsuccessful treatments, she checked herself into a mental hospital. Lovejoy said she hated making this step not only because she was terribly afraid of the hospital, but afraid of admitting to herself and the world that she had a serious illness. In the hospital, Lovejoy received the help and support she needed. After a few days, she was released from the hospital. With the help of a talented doctor and psychiatrist, antidepressants, the love and support of her family and a deep faith in God, Lovejoy has been able to live an enjoyable and normal life. She understands, however, that she has a lifelong condition and must continue her treatments, as well as constantly monitor her condition.
After her life-altering experiences, Lovejoy has devoted herself to reaching out and helping others with depression and bipolar disorder.
For many years, she attempted to record her story and write a book. She was unable to do so because it forced her to revisit those dark memories and terrifying places inside her mind. Not until 2007, 10 years after her release from the hospital, did Lovejoy finish her autobiography.
The book, entitled “The Edge of Sanity,” describes in detail Lovejoy’s most personal experiences of her battle with her illnesses. The book also contains information on depression, bipolar disorder and other related topics. As testament to the book’s value, it has become required reading for GCSU’s nursing program, and it gave her the opportunity to speak at Emory.
Lovejoy spoke about how disorders like hers are kept secret. She explained that the main reason for this is embarrassment. They are either embarrassed that they cannot control their emotions or their families do not want to admit that they have “lunatics” in their history.
Depression is often a chemical imbalance that needs medical attention in order to improve.
When the illness and histories are kept secret, people try to fight the disease themselves. Sadly, it’s a fight many cannot win alone, because people are not able to get help.
In her talk, Lovejoy used her life story as a platform to urge people to open up about their problems and seek the help they need.
Lovejoy believes that she has found her calling in life by aiding those she can relate to so deeply. She expressed her desire to have this mission be her full-time occupation after her tenure at GCSU.
Posted by Colonnade Archives
on Feb 20 2009. Filed under News.
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