Cancer patients honored at Relay

    Thousands of people walked the Survivor’s Lap during last Friday’s Relay For Life to commemorate the survivors and the departed of one of the world’s leading killers: cancer.
    However, for Joshelin Kantor, Napier Hall director and senior theatre major, the luminaries didn’t just represent people who have experienced Cancer. They represented her family, her friends and the people that have personally touched her during the year-and-a-half of extensive research for her senior capstone project.
    Kantor decided that her senior capstone would include a personal bout from the disease that claimed the lives of her grandmother and grandfather before she was even born, and most recently an uncle and a grandfather that passed away this year.
    “It’s always been prevalent from my life,” Kantor said. “Cancer affects everybody in different ways. It’s a disease that includes everyone.”
    The senior capstone would take Kantor a year and a half to prepare with all the extensive research and the countless visits to hospitals from all over the state so that she could tell other victim’s stories.
    “It came from a much bigger idea, but my adviser helped me shave it down,” Kantor said. “I talked to everyone: the patients, the family and the nurses.”
    Kantor presented her project at Relay For Life merely days after she lost her grandfather to cancer. Her project consisted of heart warming stories from survivors and departed victims, from nurses and from the families whose lives have been forever changed. Kantor couldn’t help but feel close and even attached to some of these people, which made her capstone all the more personal.
    “I wanted that personal relationship so that I can convey the feeling behind their story,” Kantor said. “It’s really hard to get that close and that personal with them. There were lots of tears, but I felt so honored and so blessed that they wanted to share them with me.”
    Not all the stories were personally told to Kantor. Some of them were passed down from family members and the nurses in the oncology ward. This was evident when she performed her speech, where many of the mannerisms, such as distinctive accents, were present. 
    “If we keep passing on stories, it will help others get through it,” Kantor said. “That was the initial nugget of my senior capstone. If one story helps you get through the tough times, then I have accomplished something.”
    The amazing thing about Kantor is through all her personal losses, she has maintained a bright and positive attitude that radiates through her personality.
    Deanna Zapfe, a close friend of Kantor’s, whose father was also recently diagnosed with cancer, can attest to the supportive and positive nature that Kantor emanates.
    “I found out about my dad’s cancer on the day of Joshelin’s (Kantor) uncle’s funeral,” Zapfe said. “I had never dealt with anything like that before and she was there helping me cope with a lot of emotions that come when something this big and this life-changing happens.”
    Zapfe and Kantor advise that it can be hard to deal with cancer. Many people, including friends are just not informed on how to comfort someone who is dealing with cancer.
    “Somedays my dad would joke about it and it’s bearable and somedays you just can’t,” Zapfe said. “There was a point in time when I couldn’t say radiation.”
    The key to helping friends and/or family cope with cancer, according Zapfe and Kantor, is to try to stay away from saying stereotypical responses such as “It’s going to be ok,” or “You don’t need to worry,” even if it deals with relatively curable cancer such as prostate or skin cancer. The most important thing is to not allow them to be alone.
    “Even if you’re not talking, just be there,” Zapfe said. “Physical presence is important because that in itself can be comforting.”
    It is also important to talk to a trusted individual, such as friends and family and even professionals, when coping with cancer.
    Although Kantor has been hit with devastating loses, she also sees it as a time to reflect and appreciate the things around her. This year, one of Kantor’s best friends will be celebrating her fifth-year landmark of being cancer free.
    “I try to be optimistic and appreciate the people that are around me,” Kantor said. “Life is short.”
    And through all this, Kantor can still be seen smiling. Although she is still coping with her losses, she has not let that stop her from her daily routine. This year’s Relay For Life is her third with Baldwin County.
    “I heard this during my uncle’s funeral: ‘I want more laughter in my heart than tears when I die,’” Kantor said. “ I feel that it is a discredit to their lives to mope around. I don’t want my burdens around. So I take moments out of my daily routine to remember them and appreciate the things I have.”

Posted by Colonnade Archives on Apr 20 2007. Filed under Features. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0. You can leave a response or trackback to this entry