Give chunky the boot!

Hey, Girls! I’m here to solve the Georgia College & State University campus of its fashion woes. As I wander around campus, I see hundreds of thousands of fashion faux pas everyday. In this column, I will address many of these problems.
First, and foremost, chunky boots and platform shoes, in general: I know that many of the people on this campus practice the tradition of wearing these terribly awkward shoes as a means of getting to where they need to go. I, along with the rest of the fashion conscious world, am here to save the many girls on this campus from making this silly fashion mistake, yet again. I’m just going to come right out and say it. Chunky boots are not in style anymore and haven’t been for awhile. You know what I’m talking about girls. Chunky boots and platforms are the shoes that have huge rubber soles and a really big thick heel. They are almost always finished off by a rounded toe and are not flattering on any girl. They also include any shoe that resembles this description such as chunky clogs, platform sneakers and loafers with an extended sole and heel that might raise you an extra three inches.
I know that many girls on this campus are going to be saddened by my extreme dislike and outright disgust of these types of shoes, but I at least hope that none of you are shocked. I have found that most girls are still wearing chunky boots because they have worn them for a while and they are just comfortable. As a general rule, you must change your shoes every two years. So, if you think about it, it’s a simple math equation. Chunky shoes plus two years ago equals no good. Please understand that right now fashion is not about comfort and is almost always about the right look for you, as well as the other people who have to look at you.
So what, you might ask, is the right shoe for you? A sleek, stylish shoe with a small heel and a more square or pointed toe is most definitely the right way to go. A big chunky boot only makes you look shorter and stockier than you actually are. A shoe that has a skinnier heel will make your legs look longer and lengthen your profile, which is something that every woman should aspire to. I tend to go with a stiletto heel and a pointed toe but I understand that not everyone can wear these, so I simply suggest a fashionable shoe that fits both your style and doesn’t hurt other people’s eyes when they look at you.
I truly hope that this column will raise the awareness that chunky boots are not OK. Please girls, get off the chunky shoe ride that you are on! I am here to help, and if you don’t understand what I’ve written, then maybe the pictures below will help you. It’s your right and to your advantage to follow these simple guidelines that I have so bluntly laid out for you. This article also goes out to the many roommates and friends of people who rock chunky shoes. It’s your duty and responsibility to them not to let them look silly. Just say no to chunky shoes!

Posted by Colonnade Archives on Feb 13 2004. Filed under Opinion. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0. You can leave a response or trackback to this entry